since as long as i could remember, baba always complains that unlike kakak,i dont really push myself to the limit. he pointed out that i always pass borderline in whatever i do, including spm and icpu, or even previously when i did, it was Allah's mercy and not because of my efforts.
yesterday, on the phone, i received one of umi's famous lectures, "our aim in life is not to merely pass, but to excel with flying colours.not only in academics, but also as a muslim. because we are muslims, we have to excel."
after giving up for literally many many years, today, i was actually forced to do it properly. the last time i was really pushed by someone was when i was in standard three/four, by muallimah madihah. after a while, she gave up on me too, and at that point, i was really relieved that i felt like saying "i told you i can't do it" to muallimah. even after today, i haven't got it right, but as maha said, i have to make it right. may allah make it easy for me, insyaAllah.
thank you to those who never gave up on me. thank you to muallimah madihah too, for making that effort when everybody told her it was just the way i am.
every single weaknesses that we have, they are not just there for nothing, we have to push ourself to the limit to overcome them. whether or not we succeed, Allah looks at the effort, not at the natijah. ganbatte everyone. to kakak, may you achieve your aim in your exams,aamiiin.
p/s:nadiah safiyyah aznan became the first mother in my batch, after delivering a baby boy last week. semoga anak itu soleh wa musleh inshaAllah, aamiiin.